Went looking on Craigslist for a Technics 1200 dustcover, found this instead:
As an avid foodie, I am always looking for tasty culinary experiences.
I am looking for a pregnant woman (preferably due around christmastime so that I can offer to my xmas guests) to sell me her placenta! I plan on using it to make a few dishes, and will probably braise some of it to make a bourgignon-style stew, turn some into a stuffing for ravioli, dice some up into a tartare and slice the rest very thinly to be cooked in a Vietnamese-style soup. If you are interested, you and your partner would be very welcome to join in this gastronomical adventure.
It would be an easy way for you to recoup some of the medical costs associated with pregnancy. You could even spend the money on the baby! If you wanted, I could give you a gift card to Toyz R Us or wherever you wanted to shop.
I would prefer if you didn’t have any blood-borne diseases, but this can be discussed.