Restraint

76

December 27, 2002 – 8:54 pm

Does anyone have the phone number for Phink and James’ place? I need to get in touch with James ASAP…

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Have you ever had one of those moments where, for no reason at all, you suddenly (and vividly) remember what seems like every haunting, painful, and heartwrenching experience that you’ve lived through?

…

Yup.

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Because sometimes we forget what it means…

December 23, 2002 – 1:35 pm

One more quote, from Peter Christopherson, Co-founder of Throbbing Gristle, Coil, and Industrial Records.

“The original idea of Industrial Records was to reject what the growing industry was telling you at the time what music was supposed to be.”

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Martin Atkins interview excerpt regarding Skinny Puppy, circa 1995

December 23, 2002 – 11:33 am

[Dwayne and cEvin] were unable, through jealousy, to allow Ogre to shine. So in Skinny Puppy, the dynamic was to suppress Ogre, and his opinion and just like the worst, worst, _worst_ dysfunctional family, there was also a support system, in which Ogre’s belief in himself and his opinion was constantly invalidated to the point where I think Skinny Puppy is dangerous for Ogre as a human being.

You have a very strong point of view.

You spend a day with those guys and you see it. When you see what I’ve seen…

What about Dwayne and Cevin’s relationship?

It’s sad. I think Dwayne is a very talented individual who, because Cevin taught him some things four years ago, and because Cevin believes Skinny Puppy is _his_ band, Dwayne will never be anything more than Cevin’s assistant.

It’s pretty twisted to see it in action. I feel very lucky to NOT be a part of a situation like that where …you know, the closest I can explain it to you – if you’ve seen Amadeus – the relationship between Mozart and Salieri.

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Excerpt from a Nivek Ogre interview, circa 1996, regarding the death of Dwane Rudolph Goettel.

December 23, 2002 – 10:36 am

But you weren’t at the funeral, were you?

No.

But cEvin was, wasn’t he?

Yeah. cEvin was. I talked to Rave and had a plane ticket booked – I scammed a plane ticket, saying it was a family member – so I had a plane ticket, so then I talked to Rave and said, “Are you going?” and he goes, “Why?” And that kind of answered all of my inside questions.

I was prepared to let a lot of it lie, and I still am letting it lie, but I know in my heart and I know in my head, because of what information I was given by Dwayne’s sister, of certain letters that were about to be sent to certain people, right before he accidentally overdosed. The contents of those letters paints an entirely different picture than I was even aware of. And so be it. I can’t speak for cEvin, and I certainly don’t want to speak out against cEvin, because cEvin’s got a lot of stuff to deal with… but his friendship with Dwayne wasn’t what he makes it out to be and what he’s projected, from the very beginning of this whole fiasco, in a lot of ways.

Just the idea of a person who is dead and who can’t speak for themself, is one of the issues I’ve had to deal with with Dwayne’s sister, because they don’t really want Dwayne’s material coming out on Subconscious. They want all of Dwayne’s data back, and cEvin’s not willing to give it back to them.

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